She Cray I Say!

We are here on vacation in good ol' New Jersey. Sans the Nor'easters (12 inches of snow piling up as I type) and my body and skin trying to acclimate to the mind numbing cold and dry air, it's been great to be home. Seeing how my kids interact with the rest of my family and their surroundings has lead me to one conclusion. When one child seems to be making progress on the scale of child rearing, for sure the pendulum starts swinging for the other child. My son I've realized, has gotten a bit better at following instructions and I see subtle but significant changes in his willingness to comply for the most part etc. I heard that 4 years old is the sunshine after the storm, he turns four next month so could this be a glimpse of the silver lining? My daughter however is, in short...DRIVING ME NUTS!!

Don't get me wrong. I love the stage that shes in. I love how affectionate she is and how each day I see how amazingly unique her personality is but in the midst of that 20 months is a hard age. Here are a few things she did the last 7 days that drove me crazy.

Crappy Timing

I was on a conference call for work. I was in the middle of getting some training on something and Kaitlyn (so I thought) was in the living room playing with toys. I suddenly smell a very potent poop stench. 

"Hey I might have to call you back I need to change my daughter's diaper."

"O yea sure no problem"

Then I look over and see Kaitlyn on by the other side of the dining table and I see that she's not wearing a diaper. I panic. Then I look to my right and... yea she took off her diaper, squatted next to me and DID THE DEED. There was a huge pile next to me of straight up POOP!

I yell, "OMG Kaitlyn pooped on the floor!!"

"O no! We can pick up next time just remember that when analyzing reports---"

"DON"T TOUCH IT KAITLYN!! DON"T MOVE!!!!!!!! DON"T TOUCH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?!??!? WHY??? WHY???????"

"Um.. ok bye." (hangs up)

Lets just say I had to get my hands dirty to clean up that mess...

Plane Torture

So coming to NJ we took two 5hr plane rides. The second plane ride was from LAX 11:30 PM to 5:30 AM, an overnight flight, now it Hawaii Time it was actually 9:30 PM to 2:30 AM. So my lovely daughter decided not to sleep a wink on the second flight instead, while the lights were off and everyone was trying to get shut eye, my daughter started screaming crying. Tossing Turning screaming crying shrieking at the top of her lungs for almost 5 HOURS STRAIGHT!! I swear if there was an exit on that plane I would have taken it. People around us were glaring at me in utter hate/judgement. I would try to walk down the aisle to give the people sitting around us a break which would only get the rest of the plane angry because the screams and shrieks would reach their ears  as well. I tried to stand in areas where there was a bit of legroom (in front of those pple who paid for economy plus, sorry guys!!) and I noticed there were young kids there trying to sleep and Kaitlyn would wake them up, to their mother's indignation. I felt so exhausted so bad, and so helpless because I couldn't do anything to console her. It was pure torture. Suffice to say I did not sleep a wink on the plane and I felt like a shadow of my former self after I got off. I felt like a piece of my soul died from the experience. I literally looked like I walked off the set of Walking Dead. It really took a couple days to recover.

Scream Cream

So after we finally got to my parents house, after that loong very terrible plane ride, Joe and Joey passed out in my old room and my mom suggested that I nap on their bed with their electric blanket. She offered to watch K who for some strange reason was wide awake. I took the offer gladly and pretty much collapsed onto the bed. An hour later while I am in deep sleep i hear Kaitlyn giggling. She wakes me up and through my grogginess I look over at her and see that there is a big glob of cream on her eye. My eyes widen and see shes got cream all over her face. I jolt up from the bed to see that her entire outfit is smeared in cream. I look over at my moms dresser and sure enough as I was sleeping she took an entire jar of Ponds Face Cream and smeared all over the carpet, dresser, and herself. Now this was a 10oz jar, yes that is 286 grams of face cream everywhere. I look at the empty jar in disbelief. I frantically grab a bunch of wipes to clean it off but the cream is soo thick it barely did anything. In frustration/ exhaustion/ anger/ delirium...

I screamed


Enter the hero of the day... my mother. She quickly entered the room, saw that I looked like a zombie/medusa that was loosing it. She took the look cream puff in her arms and said she would take care of it and urged me to go back to sleep, which I did. I woke 4 hours later feeling like a normal person again. The dresser, carpet, my daughter and her clothes, all clean. Seriously, a mother to the rescue moment. 

Pulling All Nighters

Since coming to NJ my daughter has not adjusted to the time difference at all. Hawaii is 5 hours behind NJ. However shes actually been falling asleep past her Hawaii bedtime... so that means I'm up all night with her. What does she do all night? Pretty much pulling everything off my mom desk and pulling everything out of my mom's filing cabinets! Shes been falling asleep on average between 4am and 5am NJ time. That is a looong time to be up and watching a 20 month old.

Here are some pictures I snapped the last couple days during our all nighters:

Here's a calendar she pulled off the desk...


Snapped this just as she was about to pull it off and dump it on the floor.


Here she's about to take out the very important files... I stopped her though, just in time.


Notice the small purple jar next to her? She loves taking any kind of cream off dressers and walk around with them. She is some eye cream she pulled off my mom's dresser. Like I said in my last post, NOTE THE TIME, 2:30 AM!!


Binder clips everywhere!

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