Why Is It Always My Kid?

Ever ask yourself "Why is it always my kid??" Whenever I go somewhere with our son, I find myself asking this question a lot. Ever go somewhere and you feel like everyone else's child is a perfect angel, sitting down eating their food like a civilized human being, while your child is acting like some sort of feral creature? Ever go  to the mall and see other kids holding their parent's hand, and enjoying an afternoon window shopping, while your child runs loose like the Tasmanian Devil? Well yes to all of the above for me. There are so many times and instances when this is the case. I love and adore my son but I sometimes wish he came with a dial, so  I can lower his inner energy, just a bit... or a lot... or shut it off.

Here are some examples:

Breaking Mad

Someone invited us and another family to a private performance of a Tongan choir at a church. The choir wanted the audience to sit in the front and they sang us heavenly melodies. Their voices seemed to echo through the room and maybe the whole island. While singing, they adorned us to with leis, and you could feel the aloha in the place... All other families and their children were sitting like angels, basking in the amazing talent and music emanating from the place.

My son on the other hand would not sit still for a second. He immediately started running around. He thought it was the perfect opportunity to one-up the choir by dancing, doing butt rolls, yelling "I wanna play angry bird!!" I swear, he was all but twerking. Sweat was pouring down my face trying to hold on to him. Finally he broke free from my grasp and ran out the sanctuary. So I grab Kaitlyn and we hang out in the fellowship hall, where they had refreshments laid out. Well, my son runs out of that room too and I grab may daughter again and chase after him. I finally bring him back to the fellowship hall, but see that he had shut the door behind him and it was LOCKED!! I got so mad. I just imagined the choir wanting their refreshments afterwards only to see that the door was locked. So I grab my daughter and hold my son's hand and run around the perimeter to see if there was anyway in through the back, but I see nothing but a 6 foot fence around the whole area. I imagine myself climbing the fence and breaking in from the inside, only to have a cop drive by, seeing me climb the fence, with my two kids watching. Just another crime family, nothing to see here. Yea, I'll just get charged for breaking and entering, parental negligence etc.  As I was thinking this, my son runs to the other direction. Alas! there was a way in from the other side. The patio door was slightly open and very heavy. I squeeze myself and my kids in and open the door from inside. At that moment the choir is done and they start walking in to get the refreshments having no idea of the potential crimes that might have taken place.... By this point I'm drenched in sweat and My son happy as ever, tries to swipe the cookies off the table. I think "WHY IS IT ALWAYS MY KID!!!"

Don't get me wrong I love my son but sometimes I feel like he's one maraschino cherry short of a triple-decker sundae, with every flavor except vanilla.

A Pain In My Ash

So for Lent, I had been ruminating on possible ways to communicate to my son what the season means. Different blogs had activities, illustrations and ways to get young kids to understand  Lent and how to prepare for Easter. I had a couple conversations with my son on the topic and I thought he would get a better idea during our Ash Wednesday service.

WRONG.

While every other child is sitting quietly during the service, my son immediately tries to run to the front and grab the mic. He's running around yelling, grabbing hymnals, and again I'm holding my daughter and trying to keep him in control. When it was time to receive the ashes I really wanted him to have the experience. Well we get to the front and he yells at the pastor (my husband) I don't want AASSSSSSSSHH!!!!!!!!!! (lets hope the neighborhood didn't think he was saying what it sounded like)

uuugh. Why is it always my kid??

I was so embarrassed. We left early and I'm gonna hold off on the whole Lent education till next year.

-----

The Joey Show

Whenever I drop him off at school, while the other kids sit down to take their seats to eat their morning snack, my son has to ham it up with a few dance moves, re-enactment of a scene from his favorite movie, and sing a song, while running around the room. His whole class starts hooting and hollering cheering him on. This boy lives to be in the limelight. He thinks the world is his stage. By this time, he unravels the whole class and the teacher starts putting on her A game to get everyone to quiet down.

And many many more instances.

Don't get me wrong I love my son but sometimes I feel like he's one maraschino cherry short of a triple-decker sundae, with every flavor except vanilla.

Last night I was trying to get him to sleep. He didn't nap at preschool all day and was bouncing off the walls ever since he got home. Finally he started to get sleepy. I lie next to him wondering how I'm going to get through the next  five years. My thoughts are interrupted by him taking my hand, and whispering sleepily,

"Mommy, I want to give you a heart. You are the queen, I am the prince."

He falls asleep holding my hand.

.....

I look at him and think,

"Yea I'll take you just as you are, craziness and all. Even though it may mean I have to climb a fence or two, or sweat bullets, and chase you around everywhere, any less of that wouldn't be you."

 

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